I’m in the middle of preparing a book for publication and launch in April. I thought the hard work was almost behind me, but self-publishing isn’t for the faint hearted. Thankfully my editor knows her way around the book industry, otherwise I’m sure this work of love would not have got this far, and it’s still got to land yet!
On bad days, I can only compare writing and publishing a book, to running a marathon. Not that I’m a runner, but I am a fiction writer!
‘Running, it feels good, you’ve always had a need to be physical, to exercise. Pushing yourself even when some days you don’t have the desire. But somehow, you know when your feet hit the pavement you’ll be back in the zone and pleased you pulled on your running shoes. Writing is a bit the same. There are days when distraction pulls hard and opening the laptop seems a chore, but like running, when you immerse yourself in the world of fiction, all else fades. It feels good to emerge hours later with a feeling of elation.
Well, that’s in the beginning anyway. We all know that a training run or a couple of hours writing is not the end result. It’s only a tiny part of a journey toward running a personal best or publishing a book. All the training runs and writing hours are part of the slog.
Starting the marathon, you feel fresh, well-trained and invincible. You believe you can break your own barriers. You’re pumped and ready to go. Then the tape drops and you’re off…Your first draft is complete. Feels amazing! The fact that you’re finished is amazing, this does not necessarily refer to the draft! Although at this stage you may still be thinking it is.
The other runners around you are full of hope, they jostle at this early stage, but it’s a fact, not all will last. You want to be one of the finishers…The second, third and fourth drafts get tricky. The story timelines are messy and one of the characters is not working, you change his name and fiddle around with his voice, fix it later, you tell yourself. Push on is the advice, don’t get too focused on smaller issues. Okay, you like that, keep writing.
You notice some of the runners fall behind. You pick up your pace and stay with the front group. Legs not as fresh but you know you can endure…The assessor says a few complimentary things about the manuscript, but then writes pages on structural changes required. You tell yourself to be robust, use the feedback constructively. Pour a glass of wine!
Everything around you slows. The pain in your legs congregate to your ankles and you fear an old injury is about to play up. You’re losing too much body fluid, you drain your drink bottle. Others are falling back, you and a few others hold together, just. Only half way!…Many months, years and drafts later and you have to make a decision…will this manuscript ever be ready for publication?
Tiredness hits every part of your body. You run in unison with the runner beside you. If you slow down now, you know it’s over. The ankle pain has returned to your calves and thighs, throbbing each time your feet hit the ground…You plough through yet another structural edit, hoping your editor will say, perfect! She doesn’t. You brace yourself and make the changes. On bad days, when you can’t string a sentence together, you berate yourself for ever thinking you could write a book, let alone publish one. You have another glass of wine.
Despair. Your body is shutting down, you suck at the air around you. The pain throbs and you become the pain. You want it to be over…What if the story line is too weak, the characters not authentic? You lose all sense of enjoyment. You could pull the pin now. No you can’t, too many years and you’re not a quitter. Hopefully!
Then, something miraculous happens, the home strait looms ahead, you can see the sign posts. Maybe you can get there. Your limbs relax and although exhausted you find your rhythm all over again…A copy-edit gives hope, very close now. Typesetting, book covers and a launch date chosen. Nerves jingle as the last stages begin to line up. Nearly home!’
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stories to tell. More about this another time.
